Gangway: Part VII

Posted: November 29, 2008 in Uncategorized

This was an afterparty after the Gangway closed. I felt appreciated and accepted in the Queer Freak space. That is not always the case.
I had an unpleasant experience at a paleo-lesbian dance party. I had finally gotten the courage up to flirt with the other girls on the dancefloor. I found that a lot of the girls would dance dirty with me or grind away. However, the same girls were ashamed to be seen talking to me. I was good enough to fuck but I was not the girl you took home to meet your friends. A couple of girls I liked got pulled away by their girls and taken to another part of the floor. I guess if I find a lesbian who is not ashamed to be with me, I still have to worry that her friend will feel shame. As I rode home, I thought “So this is what it feels like to be the slutty girl who the boys make out and treat like shit.”
But no worry, these were paleo-lesbians, not cool queer dykes like I met at the gangway. Paleo-lesbians structure the world around the presence or absence of penis. Their phallo-centric universe is upset by girls in male bodies.

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Comments
  1. Rikki says:

    The term “passing” has its origins in the black community. Light-skinned people (often of mixed racial origin) would sometimes be able to “pass” for white, escaping the harsh social and legal prejudice against African-Americans in the 19th and 20th centuries. I know about this first-hand; I was raised white by a white mother and a (secretly) mixed-race father. It wasn’t until I was a young teenager that I began to encounter prejudice directed against me because of my racial origins. I was bewildered by it, of course, since I had always believed I was the same color as my white neighbors.

    From this background I learned that “passing” is a pathetic denial of who we really are. It may be necessary in times of violence or economic discrimination. But ultimately it robs even the “passer” of the richness and beauty of hir identity. Today I am as proud to be transgendered as I am to be bi-racial.

    Truthfully, humanity is a rainbow of racial, national, religious, and sexual identities. True beauty is exercising the freedom to be ourselves.

    Rikki

  2. Jasper Gregory says:

    The parallels are interested. Race is an even more obviously socially constructed than gender. Set up a false and limiting dichotomy like male/female, black/white, gay/straight. Make everyone hide in one box or the other. I agree completely, the richness of the human experience cannot be reduced to these boxes.

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